seems like a discouraging post for my first writing, but it is something i have been dealing with in the last couple of months and feel its time to shed some light on the subject.
“what is the point?” “is this really worth it” these are things that have been running through my head through these cold winter months. maybe that has something to do with the dark and gloomy feeling i’ve had. every aspect of my life has been attacked by discouragement. My relationship, my spiritual life, my education and my music life have all had their days, weeks, months of just wondering why i’m doing them and what for…
i stand for a man who made it possible for me to live, a man who gives me chance, after chance, after chance and knows that the next day, i’m going to need another one. a man who is also God. i stand for a God who’s love will never fail, never fall short and is never selfish. and because i believe and stand for my God, i believe there is an enemy out there to try and ruin everything i do, an evil out there to ruin my relationship with my Savior and to discourage me in everything i do.
There is a good part to this story though, there is always a happy ending duh! just keep reading!
As you read in my first post, i am part of a band called Response, in the last couple of months i have questioned my position with them and wondering if i should keep playing with them or leave and do my own thing. Balancing a relationship, with a band, family, and school can become quite the hassle when everything gets difficult at once! not to mention the 3am-8am job i had at the time too! Life had become full and passion began to leave.
When things start to go bad, you have to go back to the start, go back to the reason you started the relationship or when you recognized the passion inside of you for that certain thing you love to do and share, for me it was music. I had to look back at the reasons for being a part of the Response band, the reason i shared my passion on a stage with a mic and a guitar. God was the reason, the kids in Uganda was the reason, the kids infront of me raising their hands, dancing, and singing for a God who’s love overflows in their lives. For my relationship, i had to go back to where it started! across from the port-a-jons at canal days when a girl took my arm, looked at my tattoo and said “i’ve read that book…”, that was the reason, her passion for kids and reaching out to people in need was the reason, the grace she gives me for my short comings and failures.
There is a reason for starting anything, you don’t start doing something you hate, there is a reason you decided to pick up that guitar, to take that picture, to write that poem… there is a reason! don’t just give up! the saying “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is very true.. when things get gloomy and discouraging, just down write depressing.. you need to fight it, share what you are feeling with someone and go back to the start, the place you fell in love. there is a light at the end of the tunnel, there is hope, and once you make it out of the darkness, you have grown and become stronger.
don’t give up, life is a storm.. and here is where i plug in switchfoot… hehe for those of you who know me.. you know me and switchfoot. sorry.. but this band is a group of guys who just know life sucks sometimes, and sing about it but also celebrate the good times. here is a song about the discouragement in our lives and how it won’t silence our love.. discouragement is not enough.. the song is called “hello hurricane” from the new album “hello hurricane” go here to watch and listen!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFjvaaF25F4
peace amigos
-mike
O mt goodness I read the begining of this… and it reminds me of things i say and write down all the time and it is just good to hear and be reminded about how things might get better. I needed that encouragment!!!
thanks for sharing this. I look forward to reading more from you! Oh…and I must say that I, too, am I switchfoot fan. and they are coming to my college in march for a concert!!!